Forgiveness

During meditation I asked my Spirit team what I should write about this week, and they quickly responded, "Forgiveness."

"Forgiveness?" I queried back. "There isn't anyone in my life I should forgive. I don't hate anyone or hold resentment against another. I'm not even angry with anyone."

"Forgiveness is important," they responded. Tell them what you do. People need to let go of the negativity.

"Hmmm," I thought not entirely convinced. That day while sitting at my desk I thought perhaps I should consider writing about something else. Meditation, crystals, past lives, Spirit guides...any of these might pique more interest than forgiveness. I made a mental note of those topics for when I was ready to write. Putting that aside, I turned to an oracle deck that I typically use once a week to see if there are any messages or themes I need to know. Can you guess which card turned up? That's right FORGIVENESS! I didn't even know that this card was in the deck, for I had never seen it before. I chuckled and quickly realized that it was a message my Spirit team wanted you to read. Lesson received. When Spirit talks, Lianne, pay attention!

I've been hurt. I've had my heart crushed by more than one person. I've been betrayed. I've felt loss. I've been robbed, and I've even been pressured to do things that I made me uncomfortable or went against my own ethics. I know I'm not alone. I don't think you can get to my age and not experience most of these heartaches. While experiencing them, I was angry, heartbroken, embarrassed, wounded, demoralised, grief-stricken, and even resentful. Those are all human emotions and quite natural given the circumstances. I'm not ashamed for feeling those emotions as I think they were healthy responses to very difficult experiences. I allowed myself to feel them, but then I moved on. I did not get stuck in the emotions or become hard-hearted as a result.

I forgave each person who wronged me. It took time; some longer than others depending on the depth of the pain they caused. Yes, the pain changed me in subtle or even pronounced ways, but I forgave all of them. I am not suggesting it is an easy feat, but what I can promise is the freedom you feel when you let go of anger, resentment, and hate. These negative emotions harm you and hold you down. They lower your vibration and impact your over well-being. They can even cause you dis-ease. There is nothing positive that comes from hatred. The receiver is not impacted by the resentment or hatred you may feel towards them. That emotion harms you and only you, and if you have influence over others, it could harm them as well depending on how your anger manifests.

How did I forgive those who hurt me? Depending on the depth of the pain, I ask Spirit to help me get over the hurt. Everyday I ask Spirit for healing and to assist me in seeing anything positive that may have come from my experiences. Perhaps it made me more resilient, more astute, or gave me a measure of happiness for a short time. I always try to find something worthwhile from the experience as difficult as it may have been. I also journal to express my anger and pain on paper (or computer depending on your preference). I write a letter to the perpetrator of pain and tell them what they did and how it made me feel. When I get all my spent up emotions on paper, I roll it into a little scroll, tie it with twine, and burn it. As it burns and the smoke rises, I imagine my anger rising with the smoke and disappearing into the atmosphere. There are a variety of ways to do this exercise, and you should choose one that resonates with you. Both writing and burning the paper are embodied ways of letting go of pain. There are other rituals that specialists can guide you with if you wish to explore more on how to let go. Finally, and most importantly for me, I send that person love. Yes, I make a concerted and consistent effort, usually at the end of my meditation or before I go to sleep at night, to send love or pray for that person to receive love. The power of prayer and thought has been well-documented, so the simple act of saying a prayer for someone or imagining love reaching them can be very effective. Done with sincerity, and in light and love, will heal your hurt and soon soothe your soul so you are no longer held down by the pain. This doesn't mean that you allow that person to hurt you again. The act of forgiveness is also an act of letting go. It's detaching from the pain in the past and not allowing that person to have a hold on you any longer. You let go with love and focus on being in the present.

Sending prayers of love to people who have harmed you or whom you may not like can be done in many situations. For instance, I have even done this with world or political leaders who cause harm. I ask the Great Spirit/The Source/God to please send them love and healing as only hurt people cause hurt. I ask for this in light and love and trust that it will reach them. For that colleague who talks behind your back and tries to sabotage your work, send them love and healing. Obviously, they would not be behaving that way if they were confident and and felt self-love. For the people who bully you online or write negative comments to you, send them love. Protect yourself and take the measures needed to ensure no further harm is done, but at the end of it, send them love and set yourself free.

Are you interested in what the Forgiveness oracle card said? Let's take a look now:

It is human to want to hold onto the past: our memories, our experiences and relationships. However, there can be times when we are carrying so much of the past that we can’t fully see the present. The past doesn’t need to equal the future. Just because you had a pattern or a recurring challenge in the past, doesn’t mean that it needs to reoccur in the future. The key is to be willing and ready to simply and cleanly let go of the hole that the past has on you. The past is gone. And it’s OK to let it go. The way to do this is to fully immerse yourself in the here and now. Be super aware of the sights, sounds, smells, textures, and energy of your present. When you do this, the past simply vanishes in the glory of the present emerges. 

Wonderful advice!